She Doesn't Know
by schatzi.mhmm
Summary: "It's all my fault. I should have gone to Slughorn's party with her. None of this would have happened. She doesn't know." Ron is with Lavender. Hermione goes to the Christmas party with McLaggen and Ron's world is turned upside down as Ginny comes to him with devastating news. He did something to her. She won't wake up. When Ron gets to her side, she's not moving. HBP.
1. Chapter 1

This does contain slightly mature/perhaps trigger content.

Lavender's had is under my shirt and I can't even appreciate it. What is going on? I wondered, completely unattached to the snog I was having.

_ Hermione is with McLaggen. Hermione snogged Viktor Krum. Hermione is probably snogging McLaggen_.

The mantra running through my head. I could be spending my evening dressed up in my best robes with Hermione looking beautiful in a gorgeous dress. Under the influence of Butterbeer, surrounded by mistletoe and dim light in Slughorn's office ...

"Stop it, Ron," I thought to myself, trying to launch myself back into the present situation where Lavender's tits were pressed up against my chest and my stiffy was becoming more pronounced, much to my actual distain.

_ I could be with Hermione. _

The common room was deserted except Lavender and I. Everyone had either been A) Invited to the party by old Sluggie himself or B) was invited by someone invited. I had been a B option but somehow royally screwed it up.

Story of my life.

The clock above the fireplace rang out. 11 o'clock. I had to go on my prefect patrol. Without Hermione. She had already been cleared by McGonagall to go so I had to perform the patrol by myself. I groaned outloud, thinking about the boredom I would soon face.

Lav mistook my groan of disappoint as a groan of pleasure at the snog I forgot we were having and grinded her hips against mine. I did actually have to stifle a real moan on that one because my stiffy was becoming painful. Not because of Lavender but because I was already enticed by the idea of Hermione in a low-cut Christmas dress.

"I have to go on rounds," I pulled back, wiping the my mouth with the back of my hand.

"Why?" She pouted, trying to bring her face closer to mine.

"That fucking party. There's going to be drunken turds," I told her, shifting her off my lap. For once, she didn't complain. She simply nodded understandingly and lifted herself off my lap, reliving some of the pressure that had built up in my trousers.

"See you tomorrow," she purred, however, a moment later before kissing my soundly on the mouth and began to ascend the staircase to the girls dorm.

My patrol was boring as dragon dung. I'd been out for about an hour, bouncing an abandoned Quaffle I'd found in the corridor, thinking about my patrols with Hermione lately.

Last year, when we had a whole amicable year, without a big blow out like the third year Crookshanks Vs. Scabbers incident or the Yule Ball fiasco, our patrols were fantastic. We'd bicker and she'd tell me all about her life before Hogwarts. It was perfect, the two of us walking in the dim light of our _Lumos_ wands.

How many times I just wanted to _Nox_ it and push her playfully against a wall ...

"RON!" a voice suddenly screamed behind me. I whipped around to see my sister, sprinting towards me, wobbly in a pair of heels. "RON! Thank God. Please, come quick."

"What is it? What happened?" I demanded, striding towards her. She stopped in front of me, grabbing onto my arm and trying to settle her breathing. I noticed tears stained her freckled face.

"Gin-" I started to say but she cut me off with a sob. I was starting to think Dean did something and anger boiled in my blood, big-brother mode kicking in.

"It's Hermione," she cried, looking up at me. My heart stopped.

"What happened?" I asked again, my voice suddenly vunerable.

"I don't know! I was walking in the corridor," she began, still trying to catch her breath. "She was on the floor and McLaggen was on top of her."

My knuckles tightened and my stomach swooping low in defeat. Ginny recognized my disappointment and quickly shook her head again, trying to stop her sobs.

"No! Ron! I think he did something to her. Ron, his pants were around his ankles and he was just in his shorts. He told me to 'bugger off' but she wasn't moving , Ron! I threatened to hit him with a Bat-Bogey if he didn't get off of her and he just left. Ron! She won't wake up!" She cried.

My heart stopped again.

"Where?" was all I could croak out. Gin grabbed my hand and we were suddenly running again. Gin was stumbling under the speed I was running at. Every neuron in my body was firing at rapid speed, trying to stop myself from having a heart attack.

_She has to be okay. She has to be. _

"Go on. I can't run anymore in these damned things. She's on the stairs of the astronomy tower. I didn't want to leave her but ..." Ginny began to say before stopping abruptly to let out a sob. "I'll go get a professor. Go on"

I squeezed her shoulder and rounded the corner at lightening speed.

When I reached the base of the stairs, leading up to the darkened tower, a pale reflection of blue caught my eyes on the landing halfway up. I took the stairs two, sometimes three at a time, before I dropped to the ground beside her.

She looked quite angelic, really. Her curly hair was laid around her. Her teal colored dress wrapped around her delicately. Her eyes were closed and her mouth was open in a little "O" shape.

I felt a wooping sensation of guilt as I noticed she wasn't stirring and a pair of knickers rested on the ground by her feet.

I couldn't focus on the fact that Hermione was laying on the ground without her knickers because all I could think about was the fact that I could barely see her breathing and there was a small pool of blood surrounding her head.

Blood.

"'Mione," I whispered my almost forgotten pet name for her, reaching for her wrist that rested next to her head. "'Mione, it's me. It's Ron."

I cupped her face in my hands, reaching my fingers down her neck to find a pulse. Beating daintily against my lanky fingers, I found it. Her breathing was shallow and her skin was turning white with each passing second.

My stomach began convulsing, trying to choke out a sob but I forced it back. Goosebumps were raised on her arms so I ripped my cloak off me, pulling her up and into my arms. My cloak was floor length so it cacooned her inside it.

Using my legs, I stood myself up, tucking Hermione against my chest as I began to descend the stairs to the astronomy tower. I felt the sleeve of my shirt slicken with the blood matted to her hair.

"WEASLEY!" a voice called out of me, panicked. I looked up to see Ginny with Snape, his robes billowing around him as he walked briskly with her. Of all the teachers she happened to find first. ...

"Professor, she's not awake. She'd bleeding. He did something to her. He tried to..." I spit out, angerly, losing all ability to finish speaking. His face hardened for a moment, staring down at the helpless genuis resting in my arms.

"Very well. Miss Weasley, go fetch Professor McGongall. Have her collect McLaggen and have Filch close off the tower," Snape said with authority. As much I knew of the mutual hatrage he had with each other, I had to appreciate him switching on the Professor switch.

"Let's proceed to the Hospital Wing, Weasley," he said to me in his nasally voice, once Ginny had scurried off, her heels hooked onto her fingers now.

The walk was quiet, the air surrounded with determination. In this moment, walking with Snape to the hospital wing with this gorgeous beauty in my arms, I felt my strength begin to waiver.

_She has to be okay. _

_ She has to. _

_ She doesn't know I love her. _

_ She doesn't know how much I want to be with her. _

_ She doesn't know. _

_ It's all my fault. _

_ This wouldn't have happened if I had gone to the party with her. _

_ All my fault. _

_ I'm a dumbass. _

_ I'm selfish. _

_ She doesn't know. _

My arm was soaked in the blood from the back of her head. My limbs growing weak from supporting her weight for so long, trekking across the castle. Snape said nothing, just flung the hospital doors open with a flick of his wand.

"Madam Pomfrey! Please help her!" I begged, tears falling from my eyes, as the frazzled nurse looked down at Hermoine gathered in my cloak.

"Oh dear," She managed to mumble. "What do you know?"

"I know that she was with McLaggen," I mumbled, resting her in the hospital bed she pointed too. My voice hitched and my arms were quaking. "He did something to her. Ginny found him ... on...top of ... her."

I collapsed onto the bed next to her, my head pounding with fear, grasping it in my hands.

"Okay. Severus, will you please go into my office and produce the potions for Scientiam please?" Madam Pomfrey mumbled, waving her wand with intriqute motions around Hermiones fragile body.

Suddenly, a dim purple light emitted from Hermione's body, casting a soft and warm glow around her whilst it mixed with the moonlight streaming in from the big window behind her.

Madam Pomfrey sighed gently to herself for a moment carrrying on with what she was doing.

What did that sigh mean?

A/N: Hello! Thanks for reading this story! It's only chapter one! This somehow came to me randomly this morning and I haven't written on here for a while. This is pretty random but I thought it was an interesting take on a story that's been somewhat told before.

Scientiam is the Latin word for "knowledge" and the potion Pomfrey asks Snape (the one time Potions teacher to make) would be a sort of diagnoisis potion, to figure out what McLaggen did to her. I thought it was appropriate.

This is not going to a graphic or trigger story, for the most part. You'll have to keep reading to find out what I mean by that.

I do have a few Ron and Hermione stories on my FF that I'd really appreciate you read and check out as well. "In the Heat of Battle" is a Hogwarts War/ Post-War story with a HUGE twist. I plan on updating that soon as well. "Mental Conga" involves everyone's favorite, yes, Lavender Brown. That's a sort of pre-story to ITHOB and you should read that first. I also have "Way We Are" which is another Ronmione random story.

PLEASE REVIEW FOR CHAPTER 2.

I'm a poet and didn't even know it.


	2. Chapter 2

Last night was the worst night of my life.

I drifted out of consciousness, stretched out along the bench outside the hospital wing. Ginny sat near my head, stroking my shoulder absentmindly. Harry leaned against the cool brick on floor, his dress robes flopped around him in a dishevelled mess.

We waited.

I only left once. To the loo. To wash Hermione's blood off my arm.

And then we waited some more.

Professor McGonagall came down about an hour after it happened, looking exhausted. She simply smiled at us sadly before proceeding into the wing. Professor Snape emerged and left, without acknowledging our prescene.

I didn't know if she was dying. I didn't know if I'd ever get to tell her everything she knows.

My head was pounding and the light streaming through the early morning windows were straining my eyes. Harry was fast asleep, snoring lightly with his cloak balled up like a pillow behind his head. Ginny had left after McGonagall came out, escorting her to her office to answer some questions and gather some of Hermione's things.

"To make her stay more comfortable," was all she said.

Which gave me little to zero indication about how she was. Where McClaggen was. What he did to her.

The creaking of the gigantic, ancient hospital wing doors brought me to my full category of consciousness. A tired Madam Pomfrey emerged, holding a teacup in one hand and smiling at me gently.

"Ah, Weasley. Still here I see?"

"Yes. How is she? Is she okay? What happened?" I fired off, stopping right in front of her and trying to see around her into the long and narrow wing.

"Easy, Weasley. She is fine. She's awake now," she told me calmly. She put an oddly comforting arm on my elbow, throwing a quick look at the drooling Harry on the floor, before gesturing towards the door.

"Can I see her?" I blurted out.

_Does she even want to see me? We haven't talked in months. She's so mad at me. I was supposed to go to that party with her. None of this would have happened. She wouldn't have been... _

The look on my face may have given away the way my gut dropped to my knee caps.

"She was not ... violated, Mr. Weasley," said the nurse, gauging my reaction. "Her worst injury was the head wound. I've patched her all up."

"What did he do to her? Why wasn't she waking up?" I asked her, feeling my chest swell in relief however, still haunted by the memory of her broken and lifeless body.

"He slipped a very potent potion into her drink at the party, so we've gathered. One that should lower inhibitions and basically knock her unconscious thereafter. She is very weak from the after effects and will have to be here for some time but you Weasleys arrived at a good time," she said, smiling gravely at me.

"Where is he?" My blood was boiling.

"Let the professors handle this situation, Ron," She scoulded. I couldn't help but notice she didn't refer to me by last name, like every other time we had been thrown together.

"Right now," she continued, "There is a poorly young lady in there who needs her best friend."

Her best friend.

_Harry? Whose knocked out on the floor? _

_ Ginny? _

Me?

Madam Pomfrey patted my arm maternally before moving around me and down the hall. I was shell-shocked for a moment, about why she was leaving before she said to me, "I am meeting with the Heads of House to brief them about Miss. Granger's condition. I should be back within the half-hour. Can you stay with her?

She did not wait for an answer. She merely smirked at me with a knowing gaze. She stopped a moment later.

"Oh, and Weasley?"

"Yes, Madam Pomfrey?"

"Leave Potter sleep. Use this opportunity to speak with her privately." She simply said before continuning on the abandoned corridor.

What?

Talk to her about what? The fact that I've never been more scared in my entire life? The fact that I almost thought she died? That I can still feel her lifeless weight against my chest?

Should I talk to her about how I am madly in love with her and last night only made me realize it?

Probably not. She might hex me. Or send more bloody canaries.

My inner battle was ended to a rapid halt, as I had pushed open the door to the infirmary full, without thinking much.

My heart stopped, but not out of fear this time. My breath was cut short, my pulse quickened, my muscles quaked still; all out of the sheer immensity of the beauty I could see, curled up in a ball on the window sill.

She had a thick soft blanket wrapped around her. The contrast startled me, between the cacoon I had created around her last night with my black cloak to the way she'd nestled herself now.

Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail, her fringe hanging across her forehead which was leaning against the cool morning window. Her arms were around her knee with a tea cup identical to the one Madam Pomfrey was holding resting next to her.

She looked breath-taking.

As the sound of my footsteps in the echoing hall, she lifted her head around to look at me and we made eye contact for the first time in months.

She didn't look upset or angry with me. She didn't look embarassed or mortified at the situation she had found herself in. There is no look at resentment.

Her shoulders dropped from the tense grip around her knees and her head cocked in my direction.

She looked ... calm.

"Hey," I said with a small smile.

_ Hey? She hasn't spoken to you in months and all you can say is 'hey'? _

"Hi," she responds coyly as I walk closer to her.

"How ... er... how are you feeling?" I ask her, awkwardly perching myself on the foot of the bed in the last row, closest to her window.

With the sunlight streaming on her face, I could see her light breakmark on her cheek. I could see the honey colored tones in her hair and the warm undertone to her skin.

"I'm okay," she reassured me with a small shrug. But I could see her fingers grip her quilt more tightly around her. Protectively.

"That's good," I nod, ever the awkward bloke. She nodded too, odding me slightly suspciously. However, she says nothing more. She's waiting for me to continue.

"So, err... Ginny's gone to get you some clothes and things. Probably your books. I know you'll want some books," I tell her, rubbing my balms along the thighs of my jeans.

From the way I'm sitting, I can see blood on my shoes. Her blood.

"Um, I told her to get that big, blue jumper you always wear because I know that's your favorite," I mumble, feeling my throat begin to constrict. I can't bear to look in her eyes

The blood from her head as she was strewn across the dark staircase landing, waiting for that bastard to almost rape her, without being able to protect herself. Or defend herself.

"Madam Pomfrey didn't say how long you'll stay here but um... I figured you want that. I... er... I'm sure you'll be out in no time."

"Ron," she breathed quietly but I could stop talking.

"And Harry's here. He's passed outside like a nutter. He's snoring up a storm," I tried to chuckle whilst I made a joke but a tear had already leaked out and was making it's way south down my freckled cheek.

"Ron," she said again, this time with a choked sigh that told me she was close to or already crying.

And I looked up because the thought of her crying was too much to bear.

We were both up and moving towards each other the moment our eyes locked. When her body finally lined up with mine, arms tightly around my waist, I lost it.

"'Mione," I breathed, gripping her as tightly as I could without brusing her. I could feel her crying and I was crying and her hair smelled so good but her hair was soaked in blood yesterday and I have her blood on my shoe and Lavender but she fits so good against me and she's hugging me back.

"I've never been so scared," I whispered into her curls. She said nothing, just clutched me tighter.

"Are you okay? Are you genuinely okay? Did he hurt you?" I demanded, not loosening my hold but pulling my face back far enough to see hers.

Her beautiful brown eyes were watery and red but she let out a gentle sigh.

"I'm physically fine. My pride is bruised, more than anything," She mumbled, looking up at me sadly.

"I'm so sorry, 'Mione. This is all my fault," I caught myself saying before I could stop it. I didn't want to bring this up, but it was coming out of my mouth before I could stop it.

"How on earth..." She began but I cut her off in my rush.

"I was dumb. God, I was so dumb," I whispered, brushing back her bridge to see her eyes better. "I promised you I would go to the party with you and I fucked it all up."

For once, she didn't criticize me for my use of foul language.

"I don't blame you. Ron," she said in a accepting tone. She took a step back, holding onto both of my arms. "You saved my life, last night."

"Ginny found you," I mumbled, feeling worthless.

"But I heard you talk to me. You brought me here," she encouraged, ducking down to meet my defeated gaze.

"But I didn't protect you," I whispered, running a finger along her cheek to catch some deposited tears.

"It's not your job to protect me," she said strongly, reaching down to adjust her blanket which was still around her shoulders.

"You are my best friend, Hermione. I know we haven't talked for a few months and I know I was rude and callous to you. I know I hurt you. But ... you were so still, Hermione. I thought you were dead."

She took a breath in sharply, staring down at the stone floor between our feet.

"I just ... I miss you so much," I finally told her.

"Oh Ron," she breathed, reaching to hug me again.

"I thought you were going to die before I could tell you how sorry I am. I thought you were gone before I could tell you how I'm sorry I'm with Lavender. I wanted to be with you at that party last night, Hermione. I really did. Please believe me," I whispered into her hair.

"I do," she pulled back again, wiping a tear with her fingers. "I do."

She shook her head slowly, before stepping out of my reach to pluck some tissues from the box on the night stand. She handed me one with a smile that caused us both to blush as we dried our faces.

"Look, I'm the one in the hospital wing and you're the one who needs consoling," she said with a small laugh.

I stuck my tongue out at her playfully.

"Did Miss Granger just make a joke?" I said astonished, dodging her hand that I knew would come to punch me in the shoulder.

Just like old times.

Laughing, I put an arm around her shoulders, pulling her back into a hug.

"Can I ask you something?" she mumbled against my t-shirt.

What is she going to ask?

Please review with guesses :) xoxo


End file.
